Hello everyone. My name is Eldritch and I am not a Trekkie. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen a full episode of the TV series and I've never seen any of the movies, apart from the JJ Abrams ones. Now, before you hurl stones and rotten vegetables at me, let me explain. When I was a child and new to all things shiny spaceships and aliens, I had two choices of Star named sci-fi. I went with Wars. I never found my way to Trek, even though my father is a huge fan of the original series. Since I love my father and he doesn't ask to go see many films, I happy obliged when he asked to see Star Trek and then Star Trek Into Darkness, even though my own Star Trek knowledge was nil. I knew what internet memes, Futurama and Robot Chicken had taught me. That was it.

I enjoyed the first Star Trek movie even though I really didn't know what was going on. My father adorably kept leaning over to explain characters. "That's Bones, he's a doctor" or "that's Chekov, he's Russian" and "that guy on the away team is gonna die". I love my Dad. He was especially excited when Leonard Nimoy showed up, saying "that's the REAL Spock". We both really dug the reboot; he enjoyed seeing the new take on characters he knew and loved while I enjoyed the story and discovering those characters for the first time. My father spent the entire ride home talking about the differences between the show and the film. If anything, I can say I come about my nerdiness honestly!

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The first movie was good, but it didn't mirror any established story arch in the original series (or at least says my father). This time was a little different. Star Trek Into Darkness was a redo of an established and beloved Trek storyline. I inadvertently read a spoiler and discovered who Benedict Cumberbatch was, and I was worried. I knew almost nothing about Khan except Kirk liked to shout his name a lot. I was concerned that a Trek thing my father liked would be, well, ruined by the newer movie. I felt a little bad that I'd have no idea what was really going on, but figured it was okay if I got to stare at Benedict Cumberbatch's cheekbones for two hours. Well worth the price of admission.

I'm relieved to say the movie was exceptionally bad ass. I have no idea what parts Abrams made up and which parts were from the Wrath of Khan, but it was all really good. Kirk sacrificing himself was a little heavy-handed and I knew he'd be brought back since it was even more heavy-handed that Bones was experimenting on a dead tribble for no reason. Cumberbatch was an amazing villain. Scotty and Chekov were two of my favorites. I love them so much. Whatever they do on the ship (since I'm not really sure! I know they're like space mechanics...?), I want to be in their division! They have the most fun. I didn't buy into the romance/tiff between Spock and Uhuru. It felt... off and forced, to me. Spock is still unintentionally hilarious.

I'm also really confused about some things. I thought Starfleet was an army. I thought they were like the military in whatever future that is. That's why they have uniforms and ships with shields and guns and phasers and stuff. Why the hell does Kirk get angry that Starfleet is gearing up for a war?

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Does Spock have a first name? Or a last name? Do ANY of them? I know Captain James T Kirk, but everyone is last name only and it drove me a little nuts. He seems to be the only one with a legit name. Even Khan is just one name. I don't know why that bothered me. I know, I know, there is much Googling in my future.

I also, apparently wrongly, thought Klingons were good guys? They have their own language everyone speaks! Was Uhuru ACTUALLY speaking Klingon? I know some Trekkie's know Klingon, was it all right? I'm still confused over them being the big bad enemy. I honest to god thought they were like an important part of Star Trek and that's why that fandom knows the language. Lord of the Rings fans have Elvish, I thought Trek fans had Klingon in a similar way. Guess not...?

Khan's been built up as this terrible, terrible villain and while I thought Benedict Cumberbatch played that to perfection, I felt sorry for Khan. He wanted to save his crew, his family. He had been used by Starfleet (who seem... kinda evil?) and he wanted revenge. Well, dammit, I can't blame him for that. I mean, I didn't want him to blow up the Enterprise, but I kind of wanted him to have a happier ending. I don't know what he's like in Wrath of Khan, or what his motives are in that film, so I don't know if it was just this movie's version of events but I still felt sorry for him! Also, is he an alien or just a Captain American-esque science experiment gone wrong? I couldn't work that out...

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My father loved the hell out of the movie, saying it was very fun and very well done. He said it was completely different from Wrath of Khan, but in a good way. He understands the idea of there being two Star Trek universes better than I do. He said the original has Spock dying, which he said was a HUGE emotional thing in that movie. For the most part, he was super pleased with it. And he still leaned over and said "that's the REAL Spock!" when Nimoy showed up again. Some people have their Doctor, my father has his Spock.

I really like the characters in Star Trek. I really enjoy how they all work as a unit and how funny, brave and noble they are. Part of me wants to maybe try the original series, but I know it's pretty hokey with bad special effects (but way less lensflare), just like early Doctor Who. I'm not sure if I'll try it. Should I at least try to watch the Wrath of Khan? Do I need to watch the original series for that?

And now you may throw your stones and rotten veggies at me. Live long and prosper? *tries to do the hand thingie and fails horribly*