The Onion stops existing in paper form on December 12. I guess that's a luxury most people not exceptionally close to where The Onion is headquartered are used to, but The Onion in print is how I get through my first couple hours at work on a Thursday without hurling my monitor into the next cubicle, out the window, or at my supervisor (okay, maybe an exaggeration, but I never pantomime these actions while reading The Onion). Printed Onions, you will be missed. Here's hoping I keep up with America's finest news source just as well as all the news sources I've been trained to only think of as digital news sources (Woah. Did you guys know there was a Civil War happening in Syria?)