With Helix finishing up its second season this week I'm fortunate that Salem is back to fill the role of questionable choice in viewing. Salem doesn't have the same kind of batshit crazy as Helix, but then Helix doesn't have anyone feeding their familiar from their thigh nipple either.

Some highlights from the premiere:

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  • Some poor guy gets his penis removed and replaced with a crow (it makes sense in context).
  • Mercy gets one of the best lines of the night with "sometimes the best revenge is revenge." Sometimes someone just needs to state the obvious.
  • Two cases of gratuitous face licking of men by women. Salem also doesn't miss an opportunity for a woman in a bath either.
  • Who would have guessed that men in 1692 would be bothered by Mary Sibley taking charge in Salem? To be fair the guy did have a point about Mary being a self appointed leader acting in her disabled husband's name instead of one of the white male landowners selected by other white male landowners to be in charge.
  • Mary's son was raised for seven years by the witches. You don't suppose there's something "special" about him, do you?
  • Was anyone expecting Isaac to survive the end of last season? (I wasn't following the show between seasons so I was surprised to see the actor's name in the opening credits.)