Comic books are grand things, but they require a balance of elements to fire on all cylinders. To wit, Thor #6 is every bit as pretty to look at as its predecessors, but essentially nothing happens.

We open on backstory for Dario Agger, a character with no redeeming qualities. A snottier, petty Bruce Wayne, he is on his family's island when every last relative is murdered by modern day pirates. Young Dario fled to a cave and prayed for revenge. The blood-stained little squirt managed to pick the best cave ever for this feat, as he happened to stumble upon some kind of Minotaur totem. So that was lucky. The origin of Dario's magic powers? EVIL PRAYER. So there's that.

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Dario is still brokering the same deal with Malekith that they started talking about two issues ago. Really.

Malekith is incapable of holding his head up straight for any length of time, or keeping his fingers away from his mouth. This is his pose in every shot. Of every book. I suppose it's meant to make him look clever and playful; instead, he comes off as pretentious.

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Anyway. Roxxon is going to be mining for oil (and gods know what else) on Svartalfheim and whatever realms the Dark Elf can get is purple mitts on... if he can keep his fingers out of his mouth.

Elsewhere, the one-armed Odinson is still trying to figure out who Thor is. Heimdall the ever-vigilant refuses to spy on her, because she's doing good work for Midgard and Asgard. So, no progress there.

Elsewhere still, Dr. Jane Foster inches closer and closer to death-by-cancer. Her refusal to accept an Asgardian magical cure would make a lot more sense if she wasn't staying in Asgard to refuse it. It's... frustratingly hypocritical. The purpose it serves? Jane has a bed-ridden alibi for not being Thor.

Which brings us to Roz Solomon. She's been missing from action ever since Lady!Thor arrived on the scene, and she's been a strong suspect for who's under the helm. It'd be great if solving the mystery of Thor involved more than process of elimination, but there it is. The Odinson has been working his way through a list of possible Thors, and crossing them out one by one. That's. About. It.

Odinson arrives at a SHIELD helicarrier, only to learn that Roz is "on leave", and has been for weeks.

The only clue (and more or less establishing that yes, Thor is Roz Solomon) is a shot of Solomon's flying car, hovering in mid-air. With the door open. With Thor in the air nearby.

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Dario and Malekith are STILL TALKING when Thor arrives on Roxxon's roof to break up... whatever it is they're doing. She has no actual idea. Going with her gut (and just sticking close to the jerks in her life) is serving her well.

Meanwhile, Freyja confronts Odin with his decision to bring in his brother Cul (two issues ago) and their decision to sic the Destroyer on Thor (last issue). It's not until the end of THIS chapter that the Destroyer actually shows up to wreck Thor's business.

So. Nothing happened. None of the plots advanced in any measurable way. Jane Foster is still sick. The Odinson strongly suspects (but hasn't actually solved) who Thor is. Dario Agger and Malekith still want to work together on EVIL, but haven't actually done anything but shake hands and clink (evil) wine glasses.

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The artwork is top notch, Russell Dauterman has every reason to be proud of himself. The colors by Matthew Wilson are a perfect marriage with his work. But the story essentially treads water. Take that for what you will.

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Casey Jones is a screenwriter and voiceover artist with a dayjob. He is not Thor, but hopes in his heart that he could be worthy.