So X84jdh and I have been having a Barclay-off and well, this is the logical conclusion.

For your reading dis-pleasure, I/we challenge him/ourselves to a write off. No rules, just fun. It's less of a battle and more of a collaboration. The subject: cheesy erotic fiction as inspired by Captain Max and Jinx (I should probably clarify this. It's not staring the Captain, he just inspired the battle with is Bigfoot story. I'm not saying the Captain can't make an appearance, but hey, the day is young). X84 does a line or two, then me. Back and forth we go like a Pong sprite.

When will it end? When we both give up and get lives.

Here is where it started:

Me: "She stood naked in the vineyard as the moonbeams danced off her milky white skin. The bunch of grapes she plucked off the vine felt taut in her hand as she caressed the cluster with her agile fingers. She clutched them to her ample bosom and giggled with delight as each grape tickled her flesh in such a way that she felt a sparking tingle rush down her spine. She had not know the love of fruit before and before this night was over, she would feel the pleasure of pouring a glass of her very own, house chardonnay..."


X84jdh: "The Baron watched from above. His hand, of it's own accord, slid inside the fruit bowl. His fingertips brushed past a handful of Concord grapes, and the cool flesh of those tiny buds raised goosebumps up his arm. At the bottom, he met with a Minola Tangelo, the leathery pith warm and tight. His fist squeezed, and..."

Here is my response. The rest will be a thread in the comments. Feel free to add your own two cents!

"...The juice ran across his muscular, royal hand. He raised his palm to his lips and sucked the sweet nectar from his flesh. His tongue's voracious appetite was hardly quenched as he continued to lick every drop off his fingers. His conquest of the fruit would have been complete had the local produce monger not delivered the bushel of mangoes earlier that day. He dropped the spend tangelo flesh and proceeded to the kitchen where his private farmer's market awaited..."