So, last night my phone slipped into some dish water and ceased to live. That's fine. It has been dieing for quite some time and has sort of barely been useable for the past few weeks. I wasn't upset to see it finally be at peace.
I have insurance on the phone so at 9:45PM I filed a claim and paid my $99 deductible for a replacement (if my contract was up, I'd have gotten a fancy new Moto X but alas, its not up until March.)
At 10AM today my replacement phone, same make and model, was on my desk at work. MIRACLE. I'm floored that things happened so efficiently.