Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks

Dear Military Science Fiction Writers: STOP REWRITING THE FOREVER WAR

So, this one time, back in 1974, there was this guy who was a soldier. His name was Joe Haldeman. After he got back from Vietnam, he wrote this book and it was called The Forever War. It's about space soldiers and the uncaring cruelty of bureacracy and senseless violence and war - huh! - what is it good for? It was a great novel. But can we please stop rewriting it?

The Forever War addressed a lot of the problems of the time in a way that people couldn't talk about in practical terms because the Vietnam war was a hot button issue. It holds up pretty well today, even. It's a timeless story. A classic.


Which, I guess, is why every freaking military science fiction writer feels the need to rewrite it beat for fucking beat.

Seriously, kid goes off to basic, loses sense of self, meets girl, gets separated from girl, gets blown to pieces, reunites with girl. Also, aliens. Over and over again. Forever.

NO MORE, CURSE YOUR SCALY HIDES. If you must retread something, let's get something a little more recent than 40 years, okay? You have my permission to give me The Hurt Locker IN SPACE. Or Apocalypse Now ON MARS. Or Saving Private Ryan IN ALPHA CENTAURI. How about Zero Dark Thirty IN A DYSON SPHERE.

In closing, can a bitch get something other than the 24098230th retread of The Forever War? Because you aren't doing it better, bro, you are just doing it again.

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