Hello Fellow Odeckers! Apologies I haven’t been around lately; I went on a spiritual journey of self-discovery last year in order to re-find what is important in life, and by the gods, I found it!
It’s whiskey. It’s always been whiskey. And now you know. But! That is not the reason why I came out of semi-retirement. We have Exciting News!
As you may know, there has been some turmoil in the Gawkerverse lately, and as such, management has been forced to make some … unfortunate and necessary moves in order to fend off the Hounds of Debt and Destitution. As such, effective in thirty (30 (三十)) days, the Observation Deck will be a wholly owned subsidiary owned by the esteemed Thought Catalog. That’s right! TC! That’s 2/3rds of TLC right there! Says it all, really.
We couldn’t be happier with this transition. For years, Eridani, Ruthless, and I have debated well into the wee hours of the night, just, like, fucking drunk outta our gourds like you wouldn’t even believe omg, wondering just how we can write some of sci-fi’s hottest takes and most insipid thinkpieces. When Thought Catalog dropped by the Observation Deck offices (a booth at the local county fair’s Tilt-A-Whirl), holding a gigantic novelty check for the amount of $103.28, to be split among the three of us, we pretty much threw away what integrity we had left and jumped at the chance.
So now that we have an exciting new direction, management, and enough goddamn money to buy around thirty hamburgers at McDonald’s, what do we have planned for the future? For starters, expect awesome articles spittin’ flaming hot takes on topics such as:
“Why Kylo Ren represents the abandoned orphan in all of us”
“Supernatural is the perfect embodiment of global hegemony”
“Jonas Hex: The Misunderstood Citizen Kane of modern comic book movies”
Also, now that we have a budget, this means that we have metrics to meet =/
What does this mean? It means that when the Thought Catalogservation Deck transition is complete, current authors will need to re-audition for their authorship privileges weekly. Auditions will include, but are not limited to, giant bags of filthy lucre, at least three longform think pieces (one of which must include a reference to Restoration Hardware), and a talent show.
We understand that some of you may be upset at this change in direction, but, in our defence:
Hell I already spent my share of the money on a trip to Vegas: