Episode 5 of Sleepy Hollow!!! ***SPOILERS! GREAT CRAZY BALLS SPOILERS***

Did you ever wonder what The Village would have been like if it was good? Well, don't fret. Sleepy Hollow has the answers. When a young boy stumbles out of the woods, wearing old timier clothes and speaking Middle English it is up to Ichabod and Leftenant Mills to get to the bottom of it and stop a mysterious plague that is the harbinger of the second horseman, Pestilence. Random notes:

-Ichabod questions his look. Abby suggests some new clothes might not hurt. Please, please, please do a montage where Ichabod tries on clothes!

-Abby bought Ichabod a yellow loufa. That is all.

-No slinky neck John Cho this week. Always a mistake.

-Detective Handsome Dudebro is starting to dig around and ask questions about Ichabod. Not cool, bro.

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-Ichabod and Abby find out the ghost of Virginia Dare told the Roanoke Colony to pack up and move to Sleepy Hollow. This show is great.

-A lot of M. Night parallels this weeks. Starts out with a little The Village, then it turns out the water is the magic cure to keep away the second horseman and big twist, everyone in the colony including Thomas were ghosts the whole time!

-Is pestilence a samurai?

Captain "Not Washington" Irving calls them at the end and says "Good news! Everyone is better now!" Well, except for the paramedic who died. I would love for this show to take the iconic image of the population sign and start showing it every week with the number changed. Who has a body count for this show?