Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks
Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks
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Hi! Oh dear, you have the wrong number. Sir, I am certain I am not Shannon, nor am I hiding anyone by that name...

Illustration for article titled Hi! Oh dear, you have the wrong number. Sir, I am certain I am not Shannon, nor am I hiding anyone by that name...

There is something really kind of fascinating about wrong number calls. When I call a wrong number, I apologize. However, I am now realizing that all these years I have been doing it wrong! Apologies are not appropriate! Rather, I need to express disbelief that I have not reached the right phone, then I need to ask the answerer if they are sure they know who lives in their home or if they are sure of their own identity, then I have the option of being rude. I can also call back several times! Cool!

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As the recipient of a number of these recently, both on cell and landline, I am reserving the option of stringing repeating mis-callers along in those cases I can identify as being Rude, Dumb Asshats. If my time is being used up, it may as well be interesting.

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