I was printing my lectures notes and other school viscera when I realized that I am probably responsible for a not-insignificant percentage of paper use in my school. I confess: Now I am become Death, Destroyer of Wood Pulp.

I'm one of those obnoxious people who "prefers to write things out. Like, I can't just stare at my laptop all day, ya know?" This means I print my lectures only at 4up (any smaller and I can't see!) AND, most sinfully, single-sided. I do not tolerate any of that double-sided nonsense. I need room to make notes! To plot down my thoughts! To make connections between all that I've learned!

Okay, I like to doodle.

What's worse is, I worked for years at a copy centre. I know first hand the sheer amount of paper we use as a society. But I don't care. Gimme my fresh clean paper!

How do you destroy the environment? Do you always get the latest phone and then feed the old ones with all their heavy metals to Ganges River Dolphins? Drink hot coffee in an air-conditioned room in the middle of summer? Break vintage thermometers over ground-water sources? Confess!

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Remember, the earth killed your family. You're just getting your revenge.