Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks

Morning Has Broken

...my will to live. Or are you a morning person? How do you wake up in the morning? And how do you feeeeeeel about it? Got any great tricks for getting and staying up? Got the best alarm clock ever? Is there an app for it? Share bests and worsts...below the breaks are some...ideas.


You could go all technical and analyse and optimise—there is more than one app for that (Sleep As Android shown above), and the current rage for Fitbits, etc, would only be useful for me while I'm horizontal. Horizontal and unconscious, preferably—I'm a chronic insomniac. I don't know how an app without attachments is supposed to measure my sleep deets, but I will be learning more today. Knowledge is power.

I depend on alarm clocks to counter medication to counter the insomnia. Dialled down to a minimum, I rise with the sun. It is handy because I don't get jet lag—can't tell the difference, really. Other than that, it's a circle of hell. But I haven't overslept in a decade without being drugged stupid.

Some people have snooze problems—once I'm up, I'm up, so I thought the idea of doing arithmetic to make the noise go away was amusing but useless. Now I realise it's *nothing*. Entry level frippery.

Some people need to chase their clocks:


Clocky runs away after it starts making noise, better go find it before it kills the cat.

Some people need to have their artistic side stimulated:


Sleep If U Can requires you to duplicate a photograph taken previously in order to stifle the din. Do not listen to your SO's suggesting of a pic of their naked ass. For multiple reasons.

But why use the stick when you can use the carrot? Well, no one other than Bugs is waking up for a carrot. The clear solution is BACON!


Me? Boring as all get out. I have an HP Touchpad mounted by my bed, and it runs one of the few decent free alarm clock apps (the only one I could find with multiple alarms, clock display, and fade-for-night display), Simple Clock. If someone writes Complex Yet Elegant Clock for WebOS, give me a holler?


(Don't forget the Snuznluz from Thinkgeek—each snooze is a donation to charity...choose your charity for maximum motivation:


¹: Less real than the taun taun sleeping bag, unfortunately.

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