So I am stuck on night audit duty once again at the hotel which mostly means browsing internet and watching Are You Afraid of the Dark? on my laptop. I modified a couple of Oaths for the occasion cause I am bored. Err, I mean, because the internet is serious business.

"Night gathers, and now my watch begins. It shall not cease until my shift ends. I shall make no other blogs, post no spam, father no sockpuppets. I shall wear no gold stars and win no recommendations. I shall live and stay awake at my post. I am the sword on the internet. I am the watcher on the Deck. I am the shield that guards the realms of Kinja. I pledge my time and honor to the Night's Watch, for this night and all the nights to come."

and

In brightest day, in blackest night,
No post shall escape my sight
.
Let those who troll for evil spite,
Beware my power, O-Deckers' Smite!!!


Edited the first a little.