SOLO’s first weekend returns are being called disappointing, despite the fact that it’s cleared over $100M domestically. I’m not here to talk about that. I want to talk about how two truly interesting women couldn’t find anything to talk about besides Boys.

The Bechdel Test is simple, if not easy to execute: Two named characters— both female— talk alone about any topic other than men. “How much was gas?” “You’re a droid fighting for equal rights? That’s fascinating.” “By all means, tell me more about what it’s like being your own Crime Boss.”

ANY OF THESE would qualify. What did L3-37 and Kira talk about? Han and Lando. Because of course they did.

It’s bad enough that women in the Star Wars franchise are few and far between enough that they don’t often have time to talk together, let alone about much besides the war.

Then along comes SOLO and Kira: We’ve got a compelling love interest who’s had to climb her way up a dirty ladder to survive, and by god she’s done it. NEAT. Then we throw in L3-37, a droid who takes no crap and is fixated on equal rights. COOL.

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Now put them in a room together! What on EARTH will they talk about?

... Boys. Not about anything going on with either of their own fleshed-out backstories, or their fiery personalities, or their flexible morality. Just... Boys.