I've seen a lot of articles about how you're supposed to feel about being spoilt, or about how being spoilt is new or old or various flavours of This Is How It Is For Society, and I wondered—how is it for you? How is it when you hear the score of the game you were have on the TiVo at home? When you find out who shot JR? That JR is going to be shot? Whether or not JR lives? All outside of watching them happen?

And does it matter how you hear it? Is it different if it's from a review, or from the guy sitting next to you in the theatre talking ten minutes ahead in the movie, or an interview with the showrunner where he talks about the themes of the show and how they're rooted in his relationship with his puppy when he was seven? Do any of those factors make a difference?

Do you sometimes not tell someone what's coming up in a story because they'll want to find out Jack's future for themselves, but there's no point not mentioning that Delia tries to kill Steven and run off with his invention, because that's no big whoop, and the show's no good anyway...

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(For me, there are some shows, I will fuck you up if you spoil me. Unless you're on the show, and you're talking to me, in which case, you can tell me anything you want, and I am totally good with it. The horse's mouth makes a difference—the quality with which its told makes a difference. If a big moment is tossed off casually and the impact of the written surprise is lost never to be experienced, then that can sting, if it's a work close to my heart, or a development worth fistpumping.)

But, in the end—do you really think that your attitude towards being spoilt does apply to everyone else? I mean, if you are a spoiler virgin, do you believe everyone else should be? Or should everyone be exactly as spoiler slutty as you are? Is there one level of satisfaction that spans everyone in the audience and every story to boot?

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(I categorically think not)