Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks
Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks
Illustration for article titled Star Trek: Picard Nitpick of the Week

I embraced last night’s episode because it felt like a bad episode of Next Generation, in a good way, but there was one thing that made my Andorian antennae perk up with confusion. Spoilers and pedantry to ensue.

Illustration for article titled Star Trek: Picard Nitpick of the Week
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Illustration for article titled Star Trek: Picard Nitpick of the Week

The nitpick is unrelated to Riker’s sweet-ass dedicated pizza oven or his savory-looking artisanal pizza, although that shit left me craving some goddamn pizza margherita so mightily I was distracted for the rest of the episode, no joke.

Sidebar: why is it spelled margherita and not margarita?

Illustration for article titled Star Trek: Picard Nitpick of the Week
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A multi-volume nitpick treatise could be written about Allison Pill’s mind meld with Commodore Oh. Vulcan mind melds do not see into the future. What do Vulcan mind melds not do? See into the future. Do Vulcan mind melds see into the future? No, they do not. So was this a mindfuck mind meld, has Oh actually seen the future herself or was it just sloppy conceptualization? I fear it is the latter, but that’s not what I’m going to go with either.

Illustration for article titled Star Trek: Picard Nitpick of the Week
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Why the fuck was Soji eating a tomato like that? It’s not an apple, it’s a tomato. Couldn’t have Troi better instructed her in proper tomato consumption protocols? Do betazoids eat tomatoes like that too? Didn’t Data or Maddox program Soji’s databanks with what a tomato was?

Engaging in forbidden Romulan meditation,

This has been your Star Trek: Picard Nitpick of the Week

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