Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks
Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks

TMIT: Too Much Information Thursday

In which we do the Dance of Joy. What good news have you gotten lately?

After a stressful, anxiety-packed weekend we got the best news possible. Last Thursday afternoon the Women’s Health Center called Dr. Mrs. Hatrack and said they found a spot on her mammogram, could she come in the next day to do another? Since her mom died of breast cancer this was The Call she’s been dreading for the last 35 years. Friday comes and we head to the hospital. The Women’s Center walls are covered in platitudes and pan flutes are playing in the background. (If platitudes and pan flutes soothe and strengthen you, good for you. They give DMH rage fits.) The mammo tech comes out to take her back, we both stand up and she tells us that I can’t come. DMH says “Then I’m not doing it” and walks out the door. I run and catch her and tell her that we will make them let me be with her and we head back. Realizing they have seriously misjudged her anxiety the tech and the front desk attendant brainstorm and decide they can take us around the back hallway and let us wait in an unused room until it’s her turn. She does the mammo and the spot is still there and they want her to stick around and do an ultrasound. We wait another hour and she does the ultrasound. We wait for the radiologist to look at everything. He confirms that there is a 5mm mass and schedules a biopsy (oh, fuck) for Monday morning. Monday comes, DMH loads up on Ativan, and we head back for the biopsy. They’re able to completely remove the mass (YEA!) and say they’ll call on Tuesday with the results. Which they do, earlier than expected, and it’s benign!!!


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