Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks

Round 2 is over! The semi-finals are here! And boy has this been a tough race. Just two more days to go now.

The rules for how this works are simple.

  1. There are eight four groups: two for men, two for women.
  2. You get 2 1 vote for each group.
  3. The top 2 top contestant of each group moves on to the next and final round, which will be on February 12 February 13.
  4. This round is divided up into two days, lasts a single day and encompasses all of the remaining contestants.
  5. Votes are collected here (men) and here (women). Feel free to vote in both categories or just one!

And now for our contestants!

Group Alpha (Women)

Morticia Addams (The Addams Family)

  • Description: Loving mother, passionate gardener, admirer of the beautifully morose
  • In Her Own Words: “I’m just like any modern woman trying to have it all. Loving husband, a family. It’s just, I wish I had more time to seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade.”
  • Likes: Gardening, music, Gothic fashion
  • Dislikes: Cruelty, apathy, pastels

Dana Scully (The X-Files)

  • Description: Intelligent and capable government agent, dedicated seeker of truth, proud skeptic
  • In Her Own Words: “What I find fantastic is any notion that there are answers beyond the realm of science. The answers are there. You just have to know where to look.”
  • Likes: Science, medicine, stubborn idiots
  • Dislikes: Superstition, conspiracies, unverified hypotheses

Leia Organa (Star Wars)

  • Description: Orphan princess, rebel leader, rogue politician
  • In Her Own Words: “Someone has to save our skins. Into the garbage chute, fly boy. ”
  • Likes: Freedom, Jedi, scoundrels
  • Dislikes: Tyranny, superweapons, her father

Sameen Shaw (Person of Interest)

  • Description: Failed physician, brilliant intelligence officer, military veteran
  • In Her Own Words: “I’m a pragmatist. I go out, have a fun night or three, and then, uh, I move on. No muss, no fuss.”
  • Likes: Camaraderie, guns, artificial intelligence
  • Dislikes: Betrayal, whining, pointless brutality

Ellen Ripley (Alien/Predator/Prometheus)

  • Description: Commercial pilot, loving mother, committed survivor
  • In Her Own Words: “I’m happy to disappoint you.”
  • Likes: Cats, kids, flamethrowers
  • Dislikes: Corporate bureaucracy, synthetics, terrifying horrors from deep space

Group Alpha (Men)


Jean-Luc Picard (Star Trek)

  • Description: Starship captain, hobbyist archaeologist, hopeful humanist
  • In His Own Words: “It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness. That is life.”
  • Likes: Early Grey tea, diplomacy, Shakespeare
  • Dislikes: Senseless violence, dishonesty, greed


Poe Dameron (Star Wars)

  • Description: Dashing fighter pilot, Resistance hero, proud son of Yavin 4
  • In His Own Words: “I can fly anything.”
  • Likes: Freedom, bravado, defecting stormtroopers
  • Dislikes: The dark side, tyranny, loyal stormtroopers


Henry “Indiana” Jones, Jr. (Indiana Jones) 

  • Description: Adventurer archaeologist, university professor, ladies’ man
  • In His Own Words: “It’s not the years, honey, it’s the mileage.”
  • Likes: Museums, artifacts, mouthy broads
  • Dislikes: Nazis, greed, being called “Henry” or “Junior”


Rupert “Ripper” Giles (Buffyverse)  

  • Description: Passionate librarian, dedicated watcher, student of the occult
  • In His Own Words: “It only hurts when I answer pointless questions.”
  • Likes: Books, propriety, slayers
  • Dislikes: Vampires, sexism, watchers

Group Bravo (Women)


Margaret “Peggy” Carter (Marvel)

  • Description: Devoted agent, passionate feminist, patriotic Briton
  • In Her Own Words: “It’s so hard getting straight answers out of people nowadays. Whatever happened to a nice cup of tea and a civilized interrogation?”
  • Likes: Discipline, good men, nice hats
  • Dislikes: Being told no, sexism, Nazis

Diana Prince / Wonder Woman (DC Comics)

  • Description: Amazon warrior, protector of truth, ambassador to the world of men
  • In Her Own Words: “I came here to parley. But do not mistake a desire to avoid violence for the inability to deal it.”
  • Likes: Bondage, truth, compassion
  • Dislikes: Lies, sexism, cruelty

Melinda May (Marvel)

  • Description: Expert spy, skilled martial artist, loving daughter
  • In Her Own Words: “In the field, you need to maintain control. Whatever the situation.”
  • Likes: Martial arts, discipline, good people
  • Dislikes: Disloyalty, micromanagement, Hydra


Natasha Romanoff / Natalia Romanova / Black Widow (Marvel)

  • Description: Lithe ballerina, expert spy, ruthless assassin
  • In Her Own Words: “I only act like I know everything.”
  • Likes: Martial arts, privacy, awkward goofballs
  • Dislikes: The state, arrogant playboys, mind games


Inara Serra (Firefly)

  • Description: High-class courtesan, trusted friend, amateur diplomat
  • In Her Own Words: “I am grateful, you know, for the ill-conceived and high-handed attempt to defend my honor.”
  • Likes: Incense, bathing, chivalry
  • Dislikes: Cruelty, sexism, being called a whore

Group Bravo (Men)


Han Solo (Star Wars)

  • Description: Charming scoundrel, ace pilot, reluctant hero
  • In His Own Words: “Come on, admit it. Sometimes you think I’m all right.”
  • Likes: Sabbac, Wookiees, princesses
  • Dislikes: Debts, being told what to do, bounty hunters


Hoban “Wash” Washburne (Firefly)

  • Description: Ace pilot, lovable goofball, generous lover
  • In His Own Words: “I like our party better. The dress code’s easier and I know all the steps.”
  • Likes: Flying, dinosaurs, warrior women
  • Dislikes: Violence, sadistic crime lords, giant spikes


Luke Cage / Carl Lucas / Power Man (Marvel)

  • Description: Honest laborer, ladies’ man, reluctant hero
  • In His Own Words: “I protect myself and what’s mine. Being a hero puts a target on your back.”
  • Likes: Honest work, privacy, “coffee”
  • Dislikes: Coffee, nosiness, racism


Steve Rogers / Captain America (Marvel)

  • Description: American patriot, war veteran, amateur artist
  • In His Own Words: “I don’t want to kill anyone. I don’t like bullies; I don’t care where they’re from.”
  • Likes: Truth, justice, freedom
  • Dislikes: Lies, tyranny, bullies


James “Bucky” Buchanan Barnes / The Winter Soldier (Marvel)

  • Description: Trusted friend, unsuccessful womanizer, refugee assassin
  • In His Own Words: “I don’t know if I’m worth all this to you.”
  • Likes: Dancing, women, Steve
  • Dislikes: Brainwashing, Nazis, people who hurt Steve

And here are the results from yesterday:

Women, Group C:

  1. Melinda May (14 votes, 29.17%)
  2. Natalia Romanova and Inara Serra (12 votes, 25.00%)
  3. Jessica Jones, Caprica 6, Samantha Carter, and Astrid Farnsworth (9 votes, 18.75%)
  4. River Tam (8 votes, 16.67%)
  5. Selina Kyle (6 votes, 12.50%)
  6. None of the above (0 votes, 0%)

Women, Group D:

  1. Margaret “Peggy” Carter (26 votes, 54.17%)
  2. Diana Prince (13 votes, 27.08%)
  3. Mako Mori, Leeloominaï Lekatariba Lamina-Tchaï Ekbat De Seba, Chiana, Daenerys “Stormborn” Targaryen (6 votes, 12.50%)
  4. Ygritte, Beverly Crusher, and 7 of 9 Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix 01 (5 votes, 10.42%)
  5. Martha Jones and none of the above (1 vote, 2.08%)

Men, Group C:

  1. Steve Rogers (21 votes, 51.22%)
  2. Wash (18 votes, 43.90%)
  3. Logan (12 votes, 29.27%)
  4. John Reese (9 votes, 21.95%)
  5. Castiel (6 votes, 14.63%)
  6. Lee Adama (5 votes, 12.20%)
  7. Mad Max (4 votes, 9.76%)
  8. None of the above (0 votes, 0%)

Men, Group D:

  1. Han Solo (24 votes, 58.54%)
  2. Luke Cage and Bucky Barnes (12 votes, 29.27%)
  3. Finn (9 votes, 21.95%)
  4. Drogo (6 votes, 14.63%)
  5. Wade Wilson (5 votes, 12.20%)
  6. None of the above (4 votes, 9.76%)

Update: We have our winners!

In women’s Group Alpha, Leia Organa triumphed with a fairly solid lead over second-place finishers Morticia Addams and Dana Scully. But even that triumph pales in comparison to Jean-Luc Picard, who in Group Alpha for men acquired nearly twice as many votes as his closest competitor Indiana Jones.


In Group Bravo for women, Peggy Carter managed to beat out fellow comic book character Diana Prince and Natalia Romanova. While in Group Bravo for men, Steve Rogers eked out a narrow victory over Han Solo and Wash from Firefly.

That’s it for Round 3 folks! Now on to the finals!

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