Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks
Miscalibrated Internet Receptor Stalks
Illustration for article titled X-Men: Apocalypse - Reactions and Discussion

So X-Men Apocalypse seems to open in theaters in May 27... however some of us influential people (Mexicans in general) got to watch it since Thursday, may 19th. It’s about time we start reacting. This reaction post is spoiler-free. The comments on the other hand are no man’s land and free for all. Thread carefully.


I think I will be reposting this thread if you want, every other day so we don’t make a thousand articles. Or we could create a megathread later on.

I still ask you guys in the know to preface your spoilers with actual spoiler warnings. Lest people find out early of the death of Quicksilver. OK that was in the Avengers movie, but you catch my drift. Should I open a separate spoilerrific thread?



So this movie was entertaining, it’s definitely not Civil War good, though. That was a high bar. It’s not First Class good either. It’s just serviceable and not boring. I actually liked it a lot, even though I’m gonna complain the shit out of it and it’s gonna look like I hated it. There’s just so much to complain an love, like when watching the CW DC shows.


I will forever hate my theater, because they sold the tickets two weeks in advance and they were labelled Subtitled, but they went and changed their mind at the end and put that screening as Spanish Dubbed! I hate them. Too bad they are the only theater with that awesome IMAX screen in a 100 miles. Also super cheap. The dubs are good, but holy cow don’t deprive me of the silky accent of McAvoy... even if he is a creepy bastard in this movie.

  • The humor and the quips, were great though, even if used sparingly. The Star Wars movie joke was so meta, Deadpool could have pop out of the screen at any moment.
  • The plot is mostly OK but still kinda nonsense.
  • All the villains were underutilized and cardboard. Oscar Isaac did the best he could, though.
  • Magneto keeps magnetoing, but that’s why we love Crazy Uncle Magneto.
  • Everyone looks great for people in their 40's and almost 60's.
  • Jennifer Laurence is so hate-acting this movie. I like her, it’s just so noticeable.
  • Award for best mutant: QuckSilver, for the second time in a row. He is just great at everything he does. Except moving out. Such a loser!
  • Runner up: NightCrawler and his blueing everything.
  • Scott Summers is not as unbearable as I thought he would be.
  • This definitely paves the way to more movies.
  • Storm and Psyloche were criminally deprived of actual plot, but did bad-ass things.
  • Did I mention that Professor Xavier was fucking creepy in this movie? Charmingly creepy, but creepy non the less. More on that on the comment section.
  • The good guys were painfully white. I mean, some were blue, but you know what I mean. At least they have Jubilee, right?... right??!!!
  • The movie was full of “This is almost great!” moments.
  • CIA Agent Lady was also kind of having a Louis Lane problem all the way through the movie.
  • THAT was possibly the most uninspired Stan Lee cameo ever to happen in a Marvel movie.
  • Psyloche’s costume was the most comic booky costume in any of these X Men movies and it sticks out like a sore thumb thanks to the hate for Comic booky outfits in these X men movies. She also has like 4 lines of dialog during the movie.

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